Changing Your Lifestyle is NOT the Same as Dieting
My lifestyle change related to food because of my food
intolerances, but whether your lifestyle change is a choice or a necessity, it
has the potential to be one of the greatest challenges you ever face. The most
important lesson I learned when I had to remove gluten and wheat from my diet
was that I was guaranteed to fail if I didn’t do it one step at a time.
I am sure there are many people reading this, who have, at
some point in their life, gone on a diet. You go from eating what you want,
when you want to bang, having to make new recipes that the diet book swears are
nutritious and tasty and only eating when the book tells you to. You’re
consumed by your diet, because it’s so intense.
Whether you succeed at torturing yourself for three, five or
14 days, no matter how much weight you’ve lost, you put it back on as soon as
you stop dieting and start to slip back into your old eating pattern. And to
make matters worse, you add a couple of extra kilos/pounds that you didn’t have
to begin with.
The difference between dieting and changing one’s lifestyle:
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Lifestyle Change
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Wouldn’t you rather change your daily diet gradually, so
that it tastes good, is prepared to suit your busy schedule, is not stressful, and
your weight loss is permanent, because your new healthier eating has become a
lifestyle that you enjoy? I would!
If you’re changing your lifestyle due to health issues, you
may have already experienced a certain amount of depression, anger, fear, and
sadness after being diagnosed with a food allergy/intolerance. Now you have the
added pressure of turning your lifestyle upside down. And it’s often after
suffering several months/years of constant illness and riding an emotional
roller coaster.
This is why I believe it should be done at one’s own pace,
if health issues don’t require immediate changes. (Unfortunately, for some
people, severe health issues may require they expedite their lifestyle change,
and if this is your situation, I strongly suggest that you follow your doctor’s
recommendations.)
If you don’t have the added pressure of needing to change
your lifestyle urgently, it’s important to be comfortable and happy with each
step before moving onto the next one. The more confident and happier you are
after each successful step forward, the more likely you will successfully
change your lifestyle.
But, and, as we know, ‘but’ means that the statement
following it contradicts the statement preceding it, you will still need to put
a certain amount of pressure on yourself, so you don’t become too complacent.
To do this, you need to know who you are.
Identify and Use Your Flaws to Your Advantage
How you pressure yourself to succeed will depend on your personality.
Some people will desire the changes so much that their desire is enough to keep
driving them. For those that have no choice in their lifestyle change, think
about what has driven you to success in the past. Especially think about when
you’ve been indecisive and ended up arguing with yourself.
Are you competitive? If so use that competitive streak to
beat your last success. Compete with yourself and each time you win punch the
air and say ‘In your face’ to the other you. Think of your new self winning
against your old self.
Do you often seek other’s approval? Then start seeking your own approval.
Nod your head with approval each time you succeed and then start looking for
your own approval again in the next step.
Do you feel guilty if you let others down? Does that guilt
then drive you to do all you can to rectify the situation? Remind yourself of
why you’re doing the changes. Use
that guilt to drive you to stay on track.
Are you just plain stubborn? Do you often cut your nose off
to spite your face? Well it’s time to spite yourself. Each time you start to
feel momentum slowing in your progress, say to yourself, ‘I told you that you
couldn’t do it’. Then let the spiteful side of you kick in. ‘Like hell, I
can’t. I’ll do it and there’s nothing you can do about it!’
I know this all sounds a little weird and even creepy, but
it works. Each time I tried to quit smoking and failed, I got really angry with
myself. I couldn’t rely on others to push me. They didn’t know what buttons to
push to get results; they didn’t know me like I did, so I pushed myself. Each
time I told myself I was useless and couldn’t do it, my stubborn streak would
kick in and I’d be determined to prove myself wrong.
The Preparation
Plan Your Steps
Firstly, think about what order you’re going to change
things. For me, it was like this:
1. Breakfast – it contains the highest level of
gluten and wheat in it, so this was the priority meal to get sorted. I figured
the others would be much easier after getting over this hurdle.
2. Lunch – I often cooked a little extra dinner
each night and ate a reheated dinner for lunch, but when I didn't do this,
lunch usually had bread in it, so it was the next difficult meal I wanted to
sort out.
3. Snacks – No more reaching for the cookie jar
when I wanted a quick snack on the run! I needed something for when I was in a
hurry or out and about without a gluten-free option available.
4. Takeaway food – Before I was diagnosed, I was
often too fatigued to cook dinner, so we ate a lot more takeaway than usual.
Unfortunately, most takeaway foods are loaded with gluten and wheat, not to
mention fat. I needed a takeaway option for any nights when I was too
tired/unwell to cook.
5. Dinner – We’ve always been eaters of fresh
meat, fruit and vegetables, so this wasn’t too much of a challenge. I just had
to readjust my cooking to cut out pre-packaged products (e.g. wheat-based
pasta, frozen lasagne) and recipe mixes (e.g. lamb ragout packet mix that you
just add a tin of peeled tomatoes and ½ cup of water to, to create a sauce to
cook lamb chops in or gravy mix.)
6. Restaurant meals – The first time we went to a
restaurant after my diagnosis, I found myself eating the only meal on the menu
that didn’t contain gluten. Not that it tasted bad, I just really wanted to be
able to ‘choose’ a meal rather than be ‘stuck’ with a meal.
7. Eating at friends’ homes – This is near the end
of my list because I hate telling people what they can and can’t cook in their
own homes, just because I’m coming to visit. It’s not easy to get used to, but
is a necessity.
8. Birthdays – This is last because I really didn’t
think about it until I had to make a cake for one of the kids’ birthdays. Not
that they couldn’t eat gluten, but I would like to join in the festivities too!
It’s also handy when throwing a birthday party and some of the guests can’t
consume gluten. It feels good to be able to include everyone.
If you’re trying to give up a bad habit, for example
smoking, you may find it easier to get rid of one of the cigarettes that make
up a group and less likely to be missed. For example, you smoke three
cigarettes in the car on the way to work. Try cutting out the second cigarette
on the way to work. If you’re like me and want to get the hardest hurdle out of
the way first, try giving up your favourite cigarette first. (FYI, when I quit
smoking many years ago, I gave up my favourite cigarette last!)
Gather Alternatives
Alternative Situations
It’s helpful if you can avoid the worst situations in the
early days, at least until you’ve built your confidence up so you’re better
equipped to handle them. For example, I avoided eating at friends’ homes for a
while. I had enough trouble getting my head around what I could and couldn’t
eat and wasn’t comfortable telling them what they could and couldn’t cook for
me, especially when it involved reading the ingredients of every item they
used. I felt like a food Nazi!
If you’re trying to quit smoking, avoid social gatherings
that involve alcohol. I think all smokers will know exactly what I mean, so
after Christmas is a much better time to quite smoking. That doesn’t mean you
can’t experiment with cutting back on cigarettes or testing out nicotine gum
and patches in preparation for your first step.
Alternative foods/tools/methods
If you’re replacing a food item, have a couple of
alternatives in place, just in case one tastes like crap. The taste of
gluten-free food has improved greatly over the last ten years, but tastebuds
that have spent the last 20–30 years eating gluten and wheat might not agree. It’s
not just your lifestyle you’re changing, you’re also retraining your tastebuds
and they get pretty disgusted when you change the flavour of their favourite
food.
The same principle applies if you’re quitting a bad habit.
Have a healthy alternative in place in case you’re tempted to reach for that
bad habit. Munch an apple, drink water or chew gum. I knew someone who quit
smoking by chewing/sucking on the end of straws. Drinking a glass of water each
time will also help flush the addictive toxins from your body.
If you’re starting a new exercise routine, consider
incorporating it in your everyday life instead of setting the alarm to get up
an hour earlier and punish yourself. Get off the bus at an earlier stop and
walk the extra distance to work. Not only are you already up and about, you can
escape all of those hot, stinky bodies that you’re crammed against during peak
hour.
Many baby steps help to introduce new habits gradually, so
that they stay with you. Always remember that this is a long-term goal –
something that you want to do for the rest of your life – so it’s okay to take
longer to implement the changes. I’d rather take a year to change my lifestyle
and keep the new lifestyle forever rather than change it all in a month and
find that I’d slipped back into old habits a year later.
Dealing with Adversaries
Negative People
Despite the fact you’re making positive steps towards a
better life for yourself, which is usually a positive step for those closest to
you as well, you will find some people who try to sabotage your progress. The
majority of them don’t even realise they’re doing it.
They will say things that they think are supportive, but
they’re really quite negative. For example, if you’re trying to lose weight and
keep it off, someone who has tried crash diets and/or lifestyle changes and
failed might say, “Oh, I tried that, but it doesn’t work. I’m sure you’ll do
it, though.”
They’ll then go on to tell you how hard it is and all the
‘bad’ things that ruined it for them. They believe that they’re warning you of
the things that can go wrong, but what they’re really doing is chipping away at
your self-confidence and your belief that you can and will improve your life.
Get up and run as fast and as far away as you can from them and their negative
thoughts.
For those who don’t want to look weird running away, politely
interrupt the diatribe of their experiential woes and ask them about the
positive side of their experience. Did they find any interesting foods that
were healthy and tasted good? What was their favourite exercise? If they can’t
give you any positive answers, then find someone who can.
I have a friend that always says positive things about my
dreams. She’s even more positive about them than I am! When I spoke about our
dream to one day live in a rural area and be as self-sufficient as possible I’d
always say, ‘If we did it’, but she corrected me. She said, ‘Not “if”, it’s
“when” you do it.’
If you ever feel that it’s all too hard, call that positive
friend and chat about it, they’ll soon remind you that you’re special and that
your goals will happen. It’s not a matter of if you can do it, but when it
happens. For some, it takes a little longer, but you will do it. And if you
don’t have a positive friend, leave a comment on here and I’ll remind you of
how wonderful your progress is.
Yourself
No one sabotages your progress as much as yourself. You tell
yourself that one little lolly that has traces of gluten won’t hurt or that you
can refrain from smoking when out drinking with your mates when you know you’re
not ready for that big a challenge yet.
This is when you need to identify and use your flaws. Use
them to get you past that weak moment.
Enjoy the
Changes
People think that being healthy always means doing/eating
things they won’t enjoy. If you plan to exercise more, don’t join a boot camp
if you’re not comfortable with someone yelling at you. (Not that I know what
goes on at boot camp, but the words ‘boot camp’ always create images of some
ex-army guy that was never promoted, for obvious reasons, screaming at a bunch
of poor overweight people that really don’t need some egotistical tosser
telling them they’re fat and need him to improve their life.) Try swimming if
you enjoy it, going to the gym or walking with a group of like-minded people in
the park. The more you enjoy your changes, the more you’ll keep doing them.
If you want to consume more antioxidants, don’t sprinkle
dried Acai berries all over your breakfast and then gag every time you try to
swallow a mouthful. (One of my less successful dietary changes!) Instead, incorporate
more tasty foods that are high in antioxidants into your diet.
Summary
So to summarise your preparation for changing your
lifestyle:
1. Identify your flaws and how you can use them to
help you.
2. Plan the steps you’re going to take.
3. Have alternative foods/tools/methods on hand.
4. Don’t add the pressure of time to your plan
unless health requirements make it necessary.
5. Ensure the changes are enjoyable so you want to
keep doing them.
Please remember that I am not a doctor or a psychologist.
These are simply the methods that I found useful when I was forced to change my
lifestyle for health reasons.
There will be further posts to follow that contain more
details about my successes and failures in each step, and the new ideas,
interests and discoveries that my lifestyle change brought me.
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